I have been delaying writing this blog post for a while now, and I still don't quite know what to say, but I know it will help me to get some of this out.
I also have "delayed" writing this because I haven't actually had time to write this, either. But right now, I not only have time, but I am also not right about to crash and lay unconscious in a bed for eight hours. Though that time is near approaching.
I am two weeks into my first semester at BYU-Idaho. I am signed up for all of the right courses. Nearly all of my credits have transferred over. I have four semesters of classes, including the one I am in now, plus a semester of student teaching. I will graduate with my Bachelor of Arts - Music Education with Cello and Orchestra Emphasis degree in December of 2013.
There are goods and bads to being here. Most of the bads are things that I can easily look over. There are a multitude of very good things going on. It is all very different from what I have been living for the last twenty years, and it is becoming emotionally exhausting for me.
And I am homesick. I miss home so much. My family, Nick, my dogs, always having a place to go when I need to freak out or something.
At the same time, I am loving being on my own. Absolutely loving this.
It is all just going to take some time. Yet time is flying by so quickly, I almost wonder if at this rate, I will start feeling better once midterms are done and the semester is half way over and that much closer to me going home.
But no matter where I go in life, there will always be good things and bad things. Learning how to live a happy healthy life despite the obstacles is what makes us grow. I think I am doing a very good job at doing this. In only two weeks, I have grown so much. I feel like all of my potential that has been sitting inside of me, growing my whole life long, is beginning to blossom. It is only the beginning, and there is a lot of blooming left to do. I am growing at an exponential rate that has only begun, and everything will just keep getting bigger and better. It will not always be easy or happy, but in the end, I plan on being a happier, better, smarter me.